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Fiona Neill says: “Human existence is the sum of our relationships.  We all want to connect people and we never stop fancying people.”

As I get older I have started to notice more and more divorce, unhappiness in relationships or affairs.  We are part of a species with tendencies towards polygamy.  Our genetic disposition is to be with multiple partners.  Yet, somehow society or religion has set up rules and regulations to keep us with one person forever.  Our society incessantly obsesses over issues of sexuality and monogamy, trying to “catch” those who step outside the boundaries.  The media has a field day with these individuals and yet many do or wish for the same in secret.  Since the rules go against our biologic make up, we end up breaking the relationships or stay unhappy for years out of guilt, fear or financial dependence.  The couple constantly fights, totally disconnects, or seeks solace outside of the marriage.

As our current contract hasn’t been helpful I’d like make a new proposal.  I propose that we set up marriage as a five-year renewable contract.  This way we are more likely to put in the extra effort.  Relationships need work and we tend to become complacent when we think it’s forever, taking our partners for granted.  Maybe a renewable contract prevents us from letting ourselves go too.  The thought of not feeling forced to stay may take the pressure off the ones who feel trapped.

Now for those who, despite their best efforts, still can’t make it work, without fear of feeling ostracized they make a clean exit and move on to the next partner.  No rules broken, no judgments passed, no need to suffer for years until they find courage to leave.

The rare couples who do end up renewing their contract forever, the turtle doves amongst us, can rest assured that they have truly found their soul mate.

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